I woke up from a dream last night chuckling. I told or someone told me a hilarious joke that was so good it woke me up. This has happened once before. Just like the first time, this time I also could not remember the joke.

I could have dreamed the most incredible joke of all time and will never remember it. The world will also never know it. This is a great tragedy.

The world has regressed into a tiny handful of people and swarms of bugs. What a place.

“Every day there are more and more guns sitting around this house”

“Thanks for reminding me, there’s some ammo in my pockets.”

Takes ammo out and leaves it on coffee table.

I want to tell people how much I find them disgusting and why they are the reason society is a sack of shit… But I’ve done such a good job of making sure those people don’t interact with me on a personal level that I will never get the chance.

My recent experience still disrupts my mind. I still have not been able to reengage my creativity and I find myself seeking out conflict in order to test my plans against my self. It seems I have more time and pleasure arguing with people on the the very thing I am trying to destroy, compared to people who are just of no value in general. It is in this almost delirious campaign that I have realised that I have culled too much and we are at an intersection I predicted some time ago. My standards are getting more precise and I am losing resources. I have however found renewed energy in reinforcing the resources I do have and hopefully myself too. I have to in order to achieve my goals. But I also need my creativity to return. I need to finish the house doctrine I crave.

It takes a lot to change me, but here we are. I haven’t been able to do any programing for a week now. This was a big one. Several levels. A new method of thinking. A shock to my creativity. A shackle on one or two emotions undone. This year has been a good year for me.

Absolutely disgusting. But people love it.

Someone told me at the start of this year that this will be it, the end of the current civilisation cycle. I told him it wasn’t. It’s not enough. Ughhhh. I wish it was though. I know the world isn’t getting dumber at full speed before my eyes, but they’re getting louder and more noticeable.

The more I use windows 7, the more I hate it. For ever step forward it takes from windows XP, it takes 3 steps backwards, down the stairs. This is from a personal use, work and development perspective.

As for every thing else, meh. Maybe another time.

“There were two kinds of strength. One was the strength that came with having something to protect. The other was the strength of having nothing to lose.”

To those that are reading this, there is a 95% chance you are retarded. This is the state of the internet. Go home.

Took only 5 minutes going through a car magazine and seeing a bunch of guys in a beat up shit box having fun doing burnouts, to make me want to work on cars again.

Mrrrrrrr…..

I’m on another anime binge. Even when you hit a Japanese cliche, it can still be a masterpiece in its own right. Unlike western media these days.

Are my standards increasing, or is the quality of the options decreasing. I feel that I’m merely getting to know my options better and they are just worse than I thought. I need a new pool to draw from. I’ll find the right people eventually.

I was doing well with my health but something has set me back significantly. I was quite certain of a cause, however I came across something that conflicted that information. Cross testing basically made me revert to poor health. So another month or two before I can pick up my research.

Due to this though, I have spent a lot of possible productive time at home just watching shows. As such, I have been added a fair bit of new stuff to my Japanese media reviews. Pairing this up with my Japanese lessons though has been very productive, so time not lost entirely.